tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75364966096617814952024-03-20T17:40:22.703-07:00One woman's journey through the dating jungle as she follows The Rules (www.therulesbook.com)Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-12892924708016797552012-11-10T08:15:00.000-08:002012-11-10T08:15:09.155-08:00"So-and-So wants to meet you"...notOn <a href="http://www.pof.com/">POF</a> they have a feature called <b>Meet Me</b> that functions and looks a lot like '<a href="http://hotornot.com/">Hot or Not</a>'. Members can view the profile photo of a man or woman and select Yes, No, or Maybe to whether or not they would like to meet that person. If you choose Yes or Maybe the person in question then receives a notification that So-and-So would like to meet them.<br />
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POF tells you that if you spend some time going through and selecting people you'd like to meet it can render better matches to your profile based on your choices, so I went through a few profiles. Not wanting to appear too interested I refrained from selecting Yes to any of them, opting instead for Maybe. Then I heard from a couple of these guys, which is how I learned that choosing Maybe is the same as choosing Yes.<br />
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To-date there are 125 men that want to 'meet' me...yet not a single one of them have bothered to reach out to me to ask me for a coffee. So basically it's just a low effort function that allows men an alternative way of interacting passively with women without having to muster up the stones to actually send her a message.<br />
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If So-and-So really wants to meet with me and get to know me better, he will find his balls and contact me. I refuse to be pressured into initiating conversation with a pussy who is afraid to make the first move.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7xU-RxJ-YtRSJFgrovHsZ2JLE9-EO7VRV0CUvWoBUyuEzFpZZiKh2UnGc4jQfeVpDNK3aXK9hbFnO3HOIgEw59WqZU660cXFlgcCdobsct-7cOv86ZwqqhyphenhyphengbFViFnFmtRc4B0V3xYlM/s1600/cat-web-surfing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7xU-RxJ-YtRSJFgrovHsZ2JLE9-EO7VRV0CUvWoBUyuEzFpZZiKh2UnGc4jQfeVpDNK3aXK9hbFnO3HOIgEw59WqZU660cXFlgcCdobsct-7cOv86ZwqqhyphenhyphengbFViFnFmtRc4B0V3xYlM/s1600/cat-web-surfing.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hmm...plenty of fish, you say?</td></tr>
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However I realize this most likely means I will spend many more Saturday nights at home with my cat.<br />
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Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-33505023466859585492012-11-05T15:40:00.000-08:002012-11-05T15:40:49.773-08:00if you don't look like your picture chances are I will be drinking heavily until you do<div>
Ah the joys of dating in a virtual world where we can pretend to be whomever we want!</div>
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About two months ago I decided to jump back into the game and created a profile on <a href="http://www.pof.com/">Plenty of Fish</a> - a site I'd never been on before. A few of my friends had profiles on this site and were urging me to get on there and try my luck for another round. With significant reservation, albeit a strong desire to meet someone, I relented.<div>
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Not surprisingly I've been only handling messages from men who just want to chat, but have no desire to take things offline and actually meet in person. Of those who did want to meet, most of them were outside my race (although POF doesn't allow you to opt towards a specific nationality I'm only looking for white males) and desperate to find a mate. Trying to keep an open mind I went for coffee with a couple of these fellows, only to have a boring and awkward meeting during which absolutely no sparks flew and I couldn't wait for it to end.</div>
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I did manage to snag a half-decent white guy for two dates, but he stopped contacting me when it looked like things were going really well. Par for the course it seems!</div>
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Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-242129522808857422012-11-05T13:57:00.000-08:002012-11-05T13:58:05.522-08:00why you'll never get a response from me to your online dating profile<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Because of your main profile photo, you idiot...</div>
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<br />Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-87390408604033147652012-02-25T07:27:00.002-08:002012-11-05T13:58:50.904-08:00...and another thingYesterday was also my sis-in-law's birthday. She's my ex-husband's sister and lives at the other end of the country, so we're not best friends or anything. However we are Facebook friends, and I didn't post birthday wishes on her wall on principle; she has a husband of 20 years who is still deeply in love with her and professed his feelings on FB for all to see. Men like that are a dying breed, and I'm pretty sure she snagged the last one.<br />
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I hate her.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-54069940249757187352012-02-24T17:58:00.002-08:002012-02-25T07:27:38.875-08:00Reason #1 - Why I'm SingleIt's Friday night and I'm at home. The end.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-75719948665596042592012-02-23T08:26:00.005-08:002012-02-23T09:05:37.230-08:00Turning JapaneseBehold I have discovered the Secret to attracting a single white male in the city of Toronto...all I have to do is change my race to ASIAN.<br /><br />Seriously. It's a ridiculous and incredibly frustrating fact that you can't swing a dead cat in this city without hitting a white guy/Asian girl couple. It's left me scratching my fair haired head. Are Asian women really that much more attractive than us white chicks? What is it that has white guys of all ages going ga-ga over them? And, more importantly, how can we right the issue?<br /><br /><a href="http://www.fredoneverything.net/AsianWomen.shtml">Here is one man's take</a>. I wonder how many other white guys would agree with him?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWpuJJ-BUgjjwSyT94z1ArJI4kD8XxCN6paaVMq3amdQzZ_24SkP9Wi01uAvSlgSLkDdzeA4hq3KlwrLruT9RWNRg2YN-9O1EDmgAvni9n6dKD1G6d6LpsyOfgudy3Vxx4O-3qaHSz71c/s1600/Bitch+Please.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 398px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWpuJJ-BUgjjwSyT94z1ArJI4kD8XxCN6paaVMq3amdQzZ_24SkP9Wi01uAvSlgSLkDdzeA4hq3KlwrLruT9RWNRg2YN-9O1EDmgAvni9n6dKD1G6d6LpsyOfgudy3Vxx4O-3qaHSz71c/s400/Bitch+Please.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5712377790135794434" border="0" /></a>Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-8707780535813205922011-05-24T20:39:00.000-07:002011-05-24T21:27:14.623-07:00Logging OffNine months since my last post. This is partially due to life happening and partially due to the dating scene not happening. After one year of trying my luck with online dating on <a href="http://www.match.ca/">Match </a>I've pulled the plug due to a significant amount of duds and no viable candidates showing interest. My subscription has expired and I don't see the point in paying $60/month just to advertise my pathetic ongoing singleness.<br /><br />One bachelor did add me to his Favourites list just before my subscription was due to expire, so I broke <a href="http://www.therulesbook.com/">The Rules </a>slightly and gave him my email address advising him I would be going offline soon, and he could message me if he was interested in meeting me, which he did. We met for a brief coffee shortly after, and he told me all about his baggage and how he just separated from his wife of 15 years last November. Buddy needs some downtime, not a rebound relationship, so I'm not expecting much from him at all. Anyhow it's been a week since that coffee and I haven't heard back from him yet, so that's that.<br /><br />I thought I might try revisiting the speed dating scene, so K and I signed up for a <a href="http://www.singleinthecity.ca/">Single in the City </a>event at a local bistro here in Toronto. Of the 14 men I met with only two were remotely interesting...all the others could either barely speak English, or barely speak at all. There were five people interested in dating me, but of course none of them were on my shortlist.<br /><br />So back to square one. Hopefully now that the warmer weather is here it will motivate the Good Ones out of hibernation and into action and it won't be another nine months before I have something new to report.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-83926786991504962492010-08-04T19:40:00.001-07:002010-08-04T20:16:51.687-07:00Mr. Wrong: this is why I didn't respond to your dating profile<p><strong>1. Your photo(s):<br /></strong><br />Kudos for even posting one! However either your face is obscured by large sunglasses or you are merely a speck in the distance, and you can't be seen. Fail.<br /><br />Your photo features one or more previous girlfriends. Classy, dude.<br /><br />The photo is obviously very old, evidenced by the dated 80's haircut or popped collar.<br /><br />You looked pissed off in your photo...what are you going to be like on the date???</p><p>You have five zillion photos of yourself that would literally take me hours to browse. Sorry but I'm too busy for that.</p><p><strong>2. Your opening line:</strong><br /><br />Here are a few 'First Impression Fails' that kept me clicking past:<br /><br />"I need to work on my abs"<br />"Sorry ladies. I'm a Eunuch...lol"<br />"No Games!"<br />"I don't know what I'm doing"<br />"Looking for my lost shaker of salt"<br />"HAVE YOU EVER SEEN BRAD PITT... WELL I LOOK NOTHING LIKE HIM"</p><p><strong>3. You can't spell:</strong><br /><br />(Sorry if this seems like I'm picking gnat s**t out of pepper, but it's a BIG peeve of mine)<br /><br />"funny loveing and careing helpful open mind outgoing good senes of herumy likes the outdoors swim relax at cottage in front of fireplaces or have a coffe on the dock watch the sun set..."<br /><br /><strong>4. You are negative and/or yelling at me:</strong><br /><br />"I AM NOT INTO HEAD GAMES. I AM LOOKING FOR A WOMAN WHO IS STRAIGHTFORWARD AND NOT AFRAID TO SPEAK HER MIND. AT THE SAME TIME, SHE SHOULD BE SWEET, KIND, LOVING AND GENTLE. I HOPE I AM NOT ASKING FOR TOO MUCH."<br /><br />"These sites are crazy...so many people looking for the right person and I often wonder if those searching are serious at all. "<br /><br />"THIS IS QUITE A PROCESS. TO TRY AND SELL YOURSELF. I FEEL AS THOUGH I AM BEING AUCTIONED OFF ON E-BAY, OR ONE OF THOSE INFORMERCIALS ON TV."<br /><br />"Looking for someone normal.Good head on thier shoulders.No control freaks...Laid back and relaxed, but not lazy."</p>Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-25496182654926295172010-08-01T10:40:00.000-07:002010-08-01T12:21:07.677-07:00Appies for dinner!In true Rules spirit, I did not rush to return F's calls when he tried reaching me a week or so after the cruise. After his third voicemail, which I received when I was in the U.S. visiting family, I called back and left him a message saying I had been out of town, and agreeing that we could get together the week following my return. We coordinated an after work date on a Thursday night at a local seafood restaurant.<br /><br />I arrived just a few minutes late, and F was waiting for me at the bar. We grabbed a table outside and he excitedly announced that it was half-price appetizer night, adding that the appies at this restaurant were fantastic. We ordered our drinks and 3 small appetizers, and after two hours had passed I ended the date for two reasons: 1. I had an hour drive home, and 2. It was 8:30pm by this time and I was starving. F made it clear during the date that he wasn't that hungry and appetizers were more than enough for him on a hot summer evening. He did not ask if I wanted to order dinner, and I wasn't about to suggest it.<br /><br />He wanted to know if he could call me again, and after five seconds of deliberation I said that would be fine, but I'll make sure to have a full stomach before the next date, if there is one.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-39205085992770129322010-07-12T16:43:00.000-07:002010-07-12T17:47:47.306-07:00Yesterday A and I hopped the Obsession III for a Singles Boat Cruise around the Toronto harbour. It was put on by a local singles networking group and apparently they do this cruise annually and it sells out every year. A was bemoaning the fact that she was going to miss the big World Cup game and was hoping there might be a TV on board (!?). I wondered to myself if the reason there were 22 unsold tickets for men was because those 22 guys were hardcore soccer fans and couldn't imagine missing the biggest game ever to hop a boat with 50 eligible and eager women aboard, or if it's now just typical that these events are always female-heavy.<br /><br />I joked with her that her Dream Guy was likely at home in front of the tube glued to the game, and not on this boat.<br /><br />The event began with an ice-breaker game of a Bingo card with different attributes in the spaces like "Has pink polish on her nails" or "Knows how to speak Spanish", and you had to go around to different people to see if anything applied to them, and then get them to sign your card. It seemed to me that the men in general were not taking part in the game, preferring the women be the ones to get the conversation rolling. In fact the rails around the perimeter of the vessel were lined with men playing wallflower and looking bored.<br /><br />So dejected was I at the apparent lack of interest on the part of the male population in engaging a beautiful woman in conversation, that I was almost taken aback when one actually spoke to me first as I passed him on my way to the stern to take in the view.<br /><br />"Hello there...are you having a good time?"<br /><br />"Yes I am...and you?"<br /><br />"Absolutely," then extending his hand, "My name is F"<br /><br />We then went about signing each other's game cards, and A and I chatted with him for a bit (about ten minutes) before I politely excused ourselves.<br /><br />"We're going to do some more mingling...talk to you later!"<br /><br />There were a few interesting people on board and I made a determined effort to mingle and chat with as many of them as possible (men and women), staying happy and upbeat the entire time.<br /><br />The two guys from the whisky tasting event I attended previously were there (D and M). You may recall that D had asked for my number (and then sent me one measly text message never to follow up again), and M had sat in the corner the entire time checking his Blackberry. They were different on this cruise, and M was way more interested in talking to me than D was. He confided to me that he thinks D is great with women and he wishes he could be like him (WTF? Clearly they are <em>both</em> delirious). Then he went on to complain and bitch about the whisky tasting (it was a complete ripoff...but you move on), and the more M spoke the more I realized what his major malfunction is: he is just bitter in general...and this is a huge turnoff.<br /><br />They served up a nice BBQ lunch, and A and I sat at the table with L, who lives in a nudist colony between Guelph and Hamilton (I couldn't make this stuff up). He was a self-professed 'fraidy cat' when it comes to women, and, though he knew my name before I even sat at his table because he was listening in earlier when I was chatting with some guys next to him near the bar, he said he would never initiate conversation with a woman because he didn't feel he was 'smooth' enough!<br /><br />Really? I mean...seriously???<br /><br />Meanwhile A had some luck with X...a nice fellow from the UK. They became embroiled in a session of lively banter, and I took the opportunity to break off from her to work the deck on my own. They probably chatted for close to an hour before I got her to come with me to the buffet to get some lunch. X joined us at the table with L and the four of us had a nice lunch together.<br /><br />I ran into F again a few times and he eventually asked for my number. I waited a few seconds before agreeing to give it to him, and then waited patiently while he fumbled for a pencil to write it down on the back of his Bingo card. He told me I was sweet and adorable and that he would definitely be calling me. He repeated this each time I ran into him afterward. It made me a little uncomfortable, but I tried to stay light and breezy about it. I decided that if he does call me I'll give him the benefit of the doubt, and go from there...if not, no biggie. Though I don't know his age for certain I would guess he's a good 15-20 years my senior, and this fact just might prove that old-school men ask for women's numbers, and the new-age dudes avoids doing so at all costs.<br /><br />We got back to the dock four hours after setting out. By the time A and I made to disembark only one of us had given out our number. A was more than a little disappointed that X didn't ask for her digits as he seemed so interested in her and they had such a great talk. She said he had almost asked at one point, and then hesitated, as if he wasn't really sure he wanted to. Unfortunately The Rules tell us that we don't stick around chatting endlessly with one man, and that we must break off after no more than 15 minutes to mingle with other men. It didn't surprise me much at all when he didn't ask for her number at the end of the night because she had so willingly latched onto this man giving him no opportunity to chase her down and pursue her.<br /><br />On the other hand, there was some hard evidence presented to me during this enlightening event that most men would willingly throw themselves overboard before approaching a woman and engaging her in conversation. It's a hard lesson that only further erodes my confidence in ever finding a man who has a big enough set on him to make the first move.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-73494129215576906322010-07-01T17:19:00.001-07:002010-07-02T08:56:51.284-07:00Was it something I said?Well I'm almost at the end of Month #2 and I'm feeling as if the room has cleared since I put up my profiles on Match and Lavalife.<br /><br />Though my Match profile has reached 450 views, I have not been contacted by any serious or qualified matches thus far...only new immigrants with broken English skills, mystery men with profiles that are hidden to me, and men with seemingly questionable motives.<br /><br />Many online dating sites seem to claim that you need to invest in at least six months of searching before finding a good match, and I'm beginning to wonder if this isn't just a lame attempt at convincing people to commit to a longer membership, and that you actually <em>do</em> need to spend months online sorting out the wheat from the chaff in order to find suitable date material?<br /><br />I am not having any better luck on Lavalife either, with my profile only being viewed about 100 times and no serious replies to my ad.<br /><br />So it would seem that Rules Girls trying to find love online need all the patience they can muster and should be prepared to settle in for the long haul while they wait for a decent candidate to make the first move.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-20579335689680522292010-06-13T18:44:00.000-07:002010-06-13T19:22:01.765-07:00Still hearing cricketsIt's month two on Match and I just have to make contact with one more new candidate in order to meet the guarantee guidelines, so I'm good there. Other than hearing a lot of crickets chirping in the background there is precious little to report.<br /><br />I did get some interesting emails this past week that I don't quite know what to make of. They were from gentlemen from the U.S. who claim to be looking for someone special and are willing to relocate anywhere for love. They come on real strong during initial contact by saying things like "Hello Princess...your profile touched my heart...I'm interested in getting to know you", and "let's hang out spending time with good stimulating conversation doing all kinds of fun & exciting things as sharing our fantasies together" (there was a slight language/cultural barrier with that latter candidate). One of the men had a hidden profile so I wasn't able to learn anything about him beyond what he said in his email...very suspicious. I sent them both my regrets.<br /><br />This profile has now been viewed 320 times.<br /><br />As for Lava...a few nibbles here and there mainly in the form of smiles and the odd IM from browsers, but nothing significant has taken hold just yet. I've been checking out The Party from time to time, and my popularity score is over 3,500...whatever that means!<br /><br />Total profile views on Lava now at 103.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-6179492013583423912010-06-07T18:38:00.000-07:002010-06-07T19:05:18.979-07:00Bending The Rules?At the end of last week I made a decision to make it known to some of my candidates on Match that I was interested. This goes against The Rules and my better judgement, but you see I had no choice.<br /><br />Doing this involved clicking the <strong><span style="color:#ff0000;">YES</span></strong> button underneath the question <em>Are You Interested?</em> for the profile of one of my Daily 5 matches. Up until now I had been clicking <strong><span style="color:#ff0000;">MAYBE</span></strong>, as I didn't want to seem too eager; however I am wondering if that has kept me off the radar of these gentlemen, as when you click <strong><span style="color:#ff0000;">YES</span></strong> you will show up under the <em>They're Interested</em> link on their profile. This would make a woman, who might have seemed unattainable otherwise, more approachable to a guy.<br /><br />I am hoping it will prompt them to reach out to me, as I need to make sure that I am connecting with five people each month in order to keep to the regulations of the six-month guarantee. The guarantee states that if I don't find 'someone special' within the first six months I get the next six months for free. However since initiating contact is strictly forbidden in <a href="http://therulesbook.com/">The Rules</a>, I won't be able to keep to the guarantee restrictions if I don't have more people contacting me.<br /><br />So today I grabbed a hot cup of chai tea and settled in front of the computer to see if there were any lobsters in my trap. No such luck.<br /><br />Will Ms C have to bend <a href="http://therulesbook.com/">The Rules</a> to find love? Stay tuned to find out!Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-84693927449620586772010-06-04T20:39:00.000-07:002010-06-04T20:50:30.188-07:00Too busy...no really, I amOne of the primary concepts within <a href="http://www.therulesbook.com/">The Rules </a>is to not be too available. This is why we don't accept a Saturday night date after Wednesday. Saturday night being the most important night of the week, it only stands to reason that a Rules Girl is going to have most of her Saturday nights booked up well in advance.<br /><br />Tonight I received a message from one of my Match contacts that I thought had dropped off the face of the planet as he simply stopped contacting me. His email today said that he was sorry to have not responded to my last email, but that he had been out of town, and would I have time to meet with him sometime over the weekend?<br /><br />Of course I can't as I already have plans...and I didn't even have to lie about it!Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-40693356277590524432010-06-01T18:01:00.000-07:002010-06-01T18:16:31.181-07:00...Nothing new to report today, I'm afraid. The only suitor still in the game is the eager science professor who can't take a hint.<br /><br />The calm before the storm, perhaps? Let's hope so.<br /><br />Overall I'm finding much better prospects on Lavalife than Match. However the Match people seem more likely to email you than the Lava people...who prefer to just 'wink' and instant message you instead of being official. I absolutely refuse to sign up on any more sites merely out of boredom. Besides if I don't find 'someone special' on Match within six months from signing up, I get another six months for free, provided I'm following their guidelines, which so far I am.<br /><br />I am contemplating signing up for a singles boat cruise in July with A, another single friend of mine. Apparently this cruise sells out every year, so it must be worth it, right?Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-33909149757040501142010-05-30T20:01:00.000-07:002010-05-30T20:05:57.845-07:00Have no car...will not dateMy Match profile has now been viewed almost 200 times, and no new potentials to show for it.<br /><br />Today I let the science professor go, as he doesn't have the means to travel to see me and I'm at the point where I had to admit I wasn't all that interested in him anyway. One of <a href="http://www.therulesbook.com/">The Rules </a>states to admit when you need to cut bait, because it's not fair to lead someone on if you really aren't that into him. I feel good about the decision.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-78624969466355654032010-05-26T20:06:00.000-07:002010-05-26T21:09:47.609-07:00Travelling DatersMy Lava candidate, B, has just sent me SEM #3 (Stupid Email Message), to which I replied as per <a href="http://s1nglef1les.blogspot.com/2010/05/intro-reason-for-single-files.html">Rule #5</a>. It consisted of two lines with no signoff or signature, which is a format he seems to favour. He has been in South America for the past ten days and is returning home tomorrow. This is the second travelling dater I have been in contact with, and I'm wondering if there's a trend here. Are men more likely to use online dating sites when they are on the road?<br /><br />At this point I have no idea whatsoever how serious he is. His emails are quite bizarre...<br /><br /><strong>Message #1</strong><br />You pic is nice - I'm looking for a golf buddy (seriously) - do you play often? What better way to get to know someone than over 18 holes - yes? Please check out my profile - if you're interested drop me a line.<br />B<br /><strong>My Response</strong><br />Hi B,<br />I agree that a round of golf would be a great way to get to know someone. I haven't been out yet this season, and I'm dying to shake off the cobwebs, just been too busy! Gonna try to hit the driving range today - it's gorgeous outside!<br />Cheers,<br />C<br /><br /><strong>Message #2</strong><br />Did you get to the range?<br /><strong>My Response</strong><br />LOL no! Got caught up on some much needed yardwork!<br /><br /><strong>Message #3</strong><br />I heard its really nice at home right now - I am in Lima. Have been in Peru for about 10 days - leaving tonight.<br /><strong>My Response</strong><br />Temps are going to hit record highs this week they say. It's quite fantastic. Looking forward to some patio time!<br /><br />My other traveller, O, the science professor on a business trip in California, is also home now and has reached out to me again after my silence after his last SEM. He wants to get together when I am in his area (read: he has no intention of putting in any effort to travel to see me). I live about an hour away in the suburbs, and he is in the city. I have to think about this one. It actually puts the ball in <em>my</em> court in that I have to call him to tell him when I'm going to be in Toronto and ask to meet. That dog don't hunt. He <em>must</em> be the one to take the lead on this. I think I'll wait a bit and then reply that I would be interested in meeting, but I won't offer anything further and see how he responds.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-31849219076060220872010-05-25T16:41:00.000-07:002010-05-25T16:51:54.003-07:00The art of communication......is completely lost on some people.<br /><br />Today I got a text message from one of the guys I met at the whiskey tasting I was at over the weekend. I was driving when I got it so I wasn't able to respond:<br /><br /><em>Hey C, it's D. What did you get up to the rest of the weekend?</em><br /><br />Now there is one thing The Rules don't mention, and that's text messages. It's not really like an IM, because they can't tell if you're online. It's not like an email, in that you're mobile when you receive it, so you don't have to be at a computer or Blackberry.<br /><br />What's a Rules Girl to do???<br /><br />Well I've decided that I'm just going to ignore it. I really don't have time to respond right now anyway, as I've got to update my blog, go for a walk before sundown, and then get my lunch ready for tomorrow. You see I'm just too busy! He might have better luck if he were to call me live as I would be much more likely to stop what I'm doing and answer my phone. Oh well...guess he loses! I wonder if he will give up that easily or try to reach me another way?<br /><br />My interesting Lava candidate, B, responded ridiculously to the email thread he started:<br /><br /><em>Did you get to the driving range?</em><br /><br />That's it? Seriously?<br /><br />My answer, equally succinct, was to mention that I ended up getting caught up in yard work instead. That's two wasted exchanges so far. One more exchange is all he gets and then - silence. Unless in his next message he asks to meet.<br /><br />Hope is fading...Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-12489501771071828012010-05-24T09:03:00.000-07:002010-05-24T09:36:44.287-07:00All's Quiet on the Dating Site FrontChecked in on Match today and deleted a bunch of winks so I won't be tempted to reach out to those men. Nothing new to report there other than my profile views are now up to 157.<br /><br />Went onto Lavalife and returned the email from B making sure it was as brief and light as his message to me was. No new emails came in, although my profile has been viewed a few more times. I'm up to about 54 I think. Thought I'd login to <a href="http://dating-services-review.net/reviews/LavaLife.com.html">The Party</a> to see who is online and make myself more visible. Got about 17 people to turn their heads, but only 4 made contact by 'smiling'.<br /><br />Meh...I'm going out for a walk. It's too beautiful outside to be wasting the day on the internet anyway.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-69906142261629240522010-05-23T14:16:00.000-07:002010-05-23T14:56:13.385-07:00Whiskey (tasting gone) SourThinking it would be a lark, and possibly an avenue through which we might meet some interesting eligible men, K and I signed up for a singles whiskey tasting event this weekend through <a href="http://www.meetmarketadventures.com/">Meet Market Adventures</a>. The event was described as such:<br /><br /><blockquote><em>"Our Steward, will introduce us to several different types of Whiskey as we learn the difference between Irish, Scotch and Bourbon varietals. He will also introduce us to the various distilling techniques, methods of maturation and cask types that make up each unique spirit.<br /><br />As we make our way through each sample, we’ll discuss the characteristics of this popular spirit, such as it’s intensity, whether it’s floral or peaty or any other myriad of smells or tastes, it’s colour and so much more. In addition to this, we will also experience the differences in flavour when being paired with such treats as chocolate, nuts and fruit."</em></blockquote>The instruction consisted of a brief lecture at the beginning describing the difference between Whiskey, Bourbon and Scotch (our steward admitted to not knowing jack about Irish Whiskey). Then we were given just two samples of Scotch (barely an ounce each) to taste...nothing more. There was no discussion whatsoever on the characteristics of the two varietals (<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ballantine">Ballantine's</a> - blended, and 12-yr-old <a href="http://www.themacallan.com/home.aspx">Macallan</a> - single malt), other than the casual opinions we Scotch amateurs made amongst ourselves, and we didn't get any chocolate, nuts or fruit with which to pair them. The event was held at <a href="http://www.prohibitiongastrohouse.com/">Prohibition</a>, a bar on the outskirts of the <a href="http://maps.google.ca/maps/place?hl=en&rlz=1I7GGLJ_en&resnum=0&um=1&ie=UTF-8&q=riverdale+toronto&fb=1&gl=ca&ftid=0x89d4cb66b0d8eed5:0x4f5ba5590325052d&ei=sKH5S5bVDoP6lweY0dz5Cg&sa=X&oi=geocode_result&ct=title&resnum=1&ved=0CB8Q8gEwAA">Riverdale</a> area, and we were seated in a room at various tables, so there was no mingling. Everyone kept to the cliques they formed at the beginning of the evening.<br /><br />There were about 6 men and 14 women (the typical ratio at a MME event), so the MME host, Shelley (an annoyingly loud, gum-chomping bimbo), snagged a few men who had come to the bar for a drink after the FC game, to join in. This was an epic fail, however, as it turned out these men were all spoken for. In addition, she charged these men only $20 for the two shots (we paid twice that)!<br /><br />In the end, K and I only were able to meet two of the singles at the event, both of which were texting on their Blackberrys all night long. We paid $40+tax each - a ripoff if there ever was one. We expressed our thoughts quite frankly on our feedback forms, but neither of us will attend one of these events again.Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-76312507413564660872010-05-20T17:57:00.000-07:002010-05-20T19:18:24.878-07:00My name is C...and I'm a dataholicOK so I caved and put up a profile on Lavalife too after being disappointed in the calibre and variety of matches I was getting on Match. The site is way different since the last time I was actively eDating, and I'm not sure how crazy I am about the new format. However I'm staying objective.<br /><br />My only active suitor on Match is the Scientist currently in California on business. We have exchanged the maximum number of emails at this point, and I am not expecting any developments to happen as things now stand, but we shall see.<br /><br />My Lava profile has been viewed 20 times already and I have one email message from someone rather interesting! He works in film and television and seems to have a pretty fascinating lifestyle. I won't be able to get back to him until Monday now as I don't log onto dating sites from Friday evening until Sunday evening. However this being a holiday weekend I plan on being busy right up until Monday.<br /><br /><object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/rCH3w_LnmHE&hl=en_US&fs=1&" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/rCH3w_LnmHE&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object><br /><br />Have a great May 2-4!Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-29759372509929986992010-05-19T17:09:00.000-07:002010-05-19T17:25:31.345-07:00Mr. Cerebral emailed me for the third time today, and no mention of us meeting in person or getting together. He is in California right now, but that doesn't mean he can't book a date for when he returns. It's looking like he is only after a pen pal, or passing time because he has nothing else to do while he cooling his heels at the hotel between business meetings.<br /><br />I'm going to wait 48 hours to reply to his last email, and then I won't be responding to any further messages unless there is a request for a get together. Let's see where the chips fall.<br /><br />One of the people I didn't let go yesterday, J, asked me out in his second email. He has only been in Canada for 3 years, but seems more motived. The only thing that was odd is that he wanted me to decide on where and when we meet instead of making the arrangements, so I have to wonder about his agenda. I turned the tables back and told him what part of the city I worked and that he could meet me somewhere in the vicinity after work one day, and didn't hear back.<br /><br />Seeing that there are no other eligible bachelors to consider at this time, I may not have much to blog about in the coming days. I'm not too impressed thus far with the suitors I've encountered to date on <a href="http://www.match.com/">Match</a>. Last time I was registered there were lots more candidates than now. Not sure why? I may just resurrect my <a href="http://www.lavalife.com/">Lavalife</a> profile too to see if there are any viables on that site.<br /><br />Total profile views: 112Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-82225902503509311422010-05-18T19:09:00.000-07:002010-05-18T19:18:28.799-07:00Breaking some heartsI decided today to let a couple suitors go as gently as possible. Zack was one of the two Canadian newcomers that had approached me, but instead of asking me out this fellow seemed content to simply communicate endlessly via email and would send me these long, drawn out shaggy dog stories about how much he wants to find a soul mate and to tell her those all-important three words every day. The other bachelor who didn't make the cut was The Redneck. I know, I know...I agonized a long time over that one!<br /><br />I received email #2 from Mr. Cerebral. He is a scientist currently out of town on business. He informed me that I didn't have enough information in my profile, and could I please answer some questions, which he then proceeded to ask. I graciously obliged, however I plan on replying to just one last email message, after which if he does not ask to meet me that will be the end of the thread.<br /><br />Total profile view thus far: 91Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-8038785685744891982010-05-17T17:28:00.000-07:002010-05-17T17:43:58.673-07:00Keeping an open mind...Despite the fact that my profile clearly states I am looking for men between 39 and 45, I'm getting approached by much older men, like J, a newcomer to Canada with very broken English. He emailed me Saturday, I replied yesterday as per the email response interval rule (24 hrs), and in his second email to me he asked me out for a 15-minute coffee - a very small commitment. I'm trying to stay objective and not pre-judge, so I responded saying I would go. Stay tuned for those details.<br /><br />And speaking of broken English: I don't have a problem with a newcomer struggling with his language skills, but when an American whose native language is English emails me and can't spell to save his life, let alone string a sentence together, I get turned off. Here is an unedited exerpt from his last communication:<br /><blockquote><p>...<em>you are very prety its your moms falt. iam very greatfull for everything i got to. i love life.ther are so many things i like to do</em>...</p></blockquote>Oh, and did I mention that 2 out of 3 of the profile pics he posted are of him in the same white 'beater'. Why do I always attract the rednecks???Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7536496609661781495.post-27368119426705391702010-05-16T19:49:00.001-07:002010-05-16T20:01:33.411-07:00So far...so goodI registered on <a href="http://www.blogger.com/www.match.com">Match.com</a> (a site that I have previously patronized with which I am comfortable) and enabled my profile. Almost immediately I received four 'winks', but I do not respond to those. For the uninitiated, 'winks' (or <em>smiles</em>, as they are sometimes called on other dating sites) are things that you receive when someone who sees your profile wants to say HI. However as it takes virtually <strong>no</strong> effort to send a wink, I do not take them seriously or respond to them. If a man is serious about wanting to get to know me, he will send me an email.<br /><br />Another problem I have with winks is that more often than not they are sent by someone who is <em>not</em> a paid member. Many sites have it set up so that in order to communicate you must pay a membership fee. Those who pay the fee are generally much more serious than those who do not (read: "browsers'). It is important to weed out the browsers, or timewasters, so you can focus more on the serious people. An excellent example of this happened to me when I tried my luck on <a href="http://www.eharmony.com/">eHarmony</a> a couple of years ago when I was previously eDating. I was a paid member for three months and was able to count on one hand the emails I received in that time. The site was full of 'dead profiles' and unpaid members that couldn't communicate with me because they had not paid the membership fee!Ms Chttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13302024080684785510noreply@blogger.com0