Logging Off

Nine months since my last post. This is partially due to life happening and partially due to the dating scene not happening. After one year of trying my luck with online dating on Match I've pulled the plug due to a significant amount of duds and no viable candidates showing interest. My subscription has expired and I don't see the point in paying $60/month just to advertise my pathetic ongoing singleness.

One bachelor did add me to his Favourites list just before my subscription was due to expire, so I broke The Rules slightly and gave him my email address advising him I would be going offline soon, and he could message me if he was interested in meeting me, which he did. We met for a brief coffee shortly after, and he told me all about his baggage and how he just separated from his wife of 15 years last November. Buddy needs some downtime, not a rebound relationship, so I'm not expecting much from him at all. Anyhow it's been a week since that coffee and I haven't heard back from him yet, so that's that.

I thought I might try revisiting the speed dating scene, so K and I signed up for a Single in the City event at a local bistro here in Toronto. Of the 14 men I met with only two were remotely interesting...all the others could either barely speak English, or barely speak at all. There were five people interested in dating me, but of course none of them were on my shortlist.

So back to square one. Hopefully now that the warmer weather is here it will motivate the Good Ones out of hibernation and into action and it won't be another nine months before I have something new to report.

My name is C...and I'm a dataholic

OK so I caved and put up a profile on Lavalife too after being disappointed in the calibre and variety of matches I was getting on Match. The site is way different since the last time I was actively eDating, and I'm not sure how crazy I am about the new format. However I'm staying objective.

My only active suitor on Match is the Scientist currently in California on business. We have exchanged the maximum number of emails at this point, and I am not expecting any developments to happen as things now stand, but we shall see.

My Lava profile has been viewed 20 times already and I have one email message from someone rather interesting! He works in film and television and seems to have a pretty fascinating lifestyle. I won't be able to get back to him until Monday now as I don't log onto dating sites from Friday evening until Sunday evening. However this being a holiday weekend I plan on being busy right up until Monday.



Have a great May 2-4!

Mr. Cerebral emailed me for the third time today, and no mention of us meeting in person or getting together. He is in California right now, but that doesn't mean he can't book a date for when he returns. It's looking like he is only after a pen pal, or passing time because he has nothing else to do while he cooling his heels at the hotel between business meetings.

I'm going to wait 48 hours to reply to his last email, and then I won't be responding to any further messages unless there is a request for a get together. Let's see where the chips fall.

One of the people I didn't let go yesterday, J, asked me out in his second email. He has only been in Canada for 3 years, but seems more motived. The only thing that was odd is that he wanted me to decide on where and when we meet instead of making the arrangements, so I have to wonder about his agenda. I turned the tables back and told him what part of the city I worked and that he could meet me somewhere in the vicinity after work one day, and didn't hear back.

Seeing that there are no other eligible bachelors to consider at this time, I may not have much to blog about in the coming days. I'm not too impressed thus far with the suitors I've encountered to date on Match. Last time I was registered there were lots more candidates than now. Not sure why? I may just resurrect my Lavalife profile too to see if there are any viables on that site.

Total profile views: 112

So far...so good

I registered on Match.com (a site that I have previously patronized with which I am comfortable) and enabled my profile. Almost immediately I received four 'winks', but I do not respond to those. For the uninitiated, 'winks' (or smiles, as they are sometimes called on other dating sites) are things that you receive when someone who sees your profile wants to say HI. However as it takes virtually no effort to send a wink, I do not take them seriously or respond to them. If a man is serious about wanting to get to know me, he will send me an email.

Another problem I have with winks is that more often than not they are sent by someone who is not a paid member. Many sites have it set up so that in order to communicate you must pay a membership fee. Those who pay the fee are generally much more serious than those who do not (read: "browsers'). It is important to weed out the browsers, or timewasters, so you can focus more on the serious people. An excellent example of this happened to me when I tried my luck on eHarmony a couple of years ago when I was previously eDating. I was a paid member for three months and was able to count on one hand the emails I received in that time. The site was full of 'dead profiles' and unpaid members that couldn't communicate with me because they had not paid the membership fee!